What is the Gottman Method of Couples Therapy?

Marriage researcher and therapist, Dr John Gottman has been researching what makes couples relationships work for over 40 years. His research can predict whether couples will stay together with a 94% accuracy.

At Eagles Mediation & Counselling Centre Ltd (EMCC), your Gottman Therapist will help you learn ways to improve your relationships. Your therapist will provide you with specific tools to deepen friendship and intimacy in your relationship. You will also learn nuts and bolts strategies to productively manage conflicts. You will be given methods to manage solvable problems and open up dialogue about gridlocked issues. EMCC’s goal is for you to appreciate your relationship’s strengths and to grow together toward a brighter future.

Dr John Gottman, Dr Jeffrey Zeig and Mr Joachim Lee, PBM

Principal Psychotherapist,  Mr Joachim Lee

Gottman’s 7 Principles of Lasting Relationships

  1. Building Love Maps
    This principle involves getting to know each other’s worlds – past, present, and future dreams and goals. There is always more to learn about each other if you keep an open mind. Knowing the deepest aspects of each other’s inner worlds builds a stronger relationship.
  2. Expressing Fondness and Admiration
    Couples in healthy relationships express affection and appreciation for each other. Gottman says that showing respect and fondness for one another is essential for a happy relationship.
  3. Turn Toward One Another
    Couples who regularly show one another that they value each other have more loving and lasting relationships. They do little things for each other – a phone call during the day, a surprise dinner, supporting one another when one partner has had a bad day, etc.
  4. Accept Influence
    Happy couples influence each other’s dreams and goals. They involve each other in decisions that each need to make for themselves and the relationship.
  5. Solve Solvable Problems
    Couples in thriving relationships use compromise to solve solvable differences. Solvable problems are typically situational, not the ones that crop up continuously and have underlying conflict.
  6. Manage Conflict and Overcome Gridlock
    Unlike solvable problems, perpetual problems are those that reoccur over and over where couples become stuck. Gottman says that unfulfilled dreams are often at the root of reoccurring issues. To overcome gridlock, couples need to discuss their dreams with one another respectfully.
  7. Create Shared Meaning
    Healthy couples create shared meaning and purpose in their lives together. They are enriched by each other’s lives and what each brings to the relationship.

Drs John and Julie Gottman

Why Use the Gottman Method?

Gottman’s method of couples therapy is grounded in more than four decades of research with evidence of enhancing and improving  relationships that were  struggling.

Clients want concrete solutions to their relationship struggles, and the tools used in the Gottman method are highly effective at solving any problem couples have.

How you and your partner can benefit from the Gottman method

Any couple can benefit from the Gottman method of couples therapy if they commit to the therapy process and to their relationship.

Key benefits you can expect from couples therapy:

  • Deepen your friendship and intimacy
  • Increase fondness and affection
  • Enhance your connection to each other
  • Gain effective conflict resolution skills
  • Create shared meaning and purpose
  • Help each other achieve your individual and shared life dreams and goals
  • Increase trust and commitment to each other

 Gottman Method Couples Counselling Fees

Package Cost
The Gottman Assessment Package (4 sessions)

  • Gottman Assessment (2 couple interview sessions, 2 individual interview sessions and Gottman Check-up)
  • Includes Gottman Couple Report
Upon completing the Gottman Assessment package, couples may opt for standalone Gottman intervention sessions*.

*These sessions are only applicable for couples who have undergone the complete Gottman Assessment.

The Gottman Comprehensive Package: 10 sessions

  • Gottman Assessment (2 couple interview sessions, 2 individual interview sessions and Gottman Check-up)
  • Includes Gottman Couple Report
  • Includes 6 Gottman Intervention sessions.
Upon completing the Gottman Comprehensive Package, couples who wish to add on more Gottman intervention sessions may do so at the special rate of $250 per session.

**This rate is only applicable for couples who have undergone the Gottman Comprehensive experience.


For any enquiries regarding Gottman Couples Counselling at EMCC, please email our Principal Psychotherapist Joachim Lee at



During the first couples therapy session, your therapist will explore and assess your relationship problems and strengths and discuss what you want to get out of therapy.

Relationship Check-up

After your first session with your therapist, you will each complete a relationship check-up online. You will answer questions about your personal history as well as your relationship history, including current stresses, your level of commitment to the relationship, and your values and goals.


You will see your therapist alone for one session each (30-45mins per individual). This allows you to express whatever you want to say without concern for what your partner may feel or think.


In the 3rd session, you will meet with your therapist together as a couple. Your therapist will provide an evaluation of what is happening in your relationship, including your strengths as a couple as well as the areas where growth needs to occur.

Your therapist will then lay out a roadmap and intervention plan for the issues you will work on in therapy to help you move towards a more fulfilling and rewarding relationship.

Subsequent Therapy Sessions

Subsequent sessions will focus on the roadmap and intervention plan. We will continue to work on your goals until you feel more satisfied in your relationship.

Depending on the nature and extent of your problems, you will learn to build a sound relationship house and able to self-soothe when necessary.

Eagles Mediation & Counselling Centre Ltd

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