Simon and Melissa first met as classmates in Melbourne in 2018, after being placed in the same university project group. What began as friendship gradually grew into a relationship, and after more than two years of long distance between Singapore and Shanghai following their graduation, Melissa made the brave decision to move to Singapore in 2021 to begin a new chapter together.
Now, five years after attending EMCC’s Marriage Preparation Programme (MPP), Simon and Melissa have reached out to share their reflections on marriage, cultural differences, and the lessons from MPP that they still carry with them today.
Why did you decide to share your story after five years?
Both: This year marks our fifth anniversary, and we feel very blessed and grateful to have reached this milestone together. After reading another couple’s MPP story through EMCC’s newsletter, it reminded us of our own memorable experience attending MPP five years ago.
We thought it would be meaningful to reconnect with EMCC and share our reflections as a way of celebrating this chapter of our marriage. At the same time, we genuinely wanted to let others know that MPP was something we found very meaningful and helpful in our relationship journey.
Why did you decide to attend MPP?
Simon:
I was already familiar with MPP through friends and church circles, and I felt it would be helpful for us as a couple, especially because Melissa had moved to Singapore alone and was still adjusting to a completely new environment.
Since she did not yet have much support here, I thought MPP would give us both a safe and intentional space to talk through important topics together, while also allowing her to have another source of support if needed.
Beyond that, I also felt that MPP would help us discuss important aspects of marriage that couples may not naturally talk about on their own, such as communication, stress, finances, and future expectations.
Melissa:
Marriage preparation courses are not common in China, so I had never heard of something like this before. But I thought it sounded meaningful, and I was very open to trying it when he brought it up.
What were some of the biggest takeaways you remember from MPP?
Melissa:
For me, it was learning about love languages. We did a love language survey during MPP, and I learnt that Simon’s love language is words of affirmation while mine is touch.
So he knows that hugs and holding hands make me feel safe and happy, and he does that very naturally. For me, expressing myself through words did not come easily at first, but because he is very expressive, I gradually learnt from him.
Now, I say “I love you” more often, encourage him more, praise him more, and we also hug each other more.
Simon:
One of the most memorable exercises for me was learning about our family of origin. It helped me understand that we came from very different family structures and experiences, which shaped how we viewed relationships.
This helped me navigate our relationship better. It made me realise that even though I was brought up in a certain way, I don’t necessarily have to remain that way.
Are there things you still practise from MPP today, even after five years of marriage?
Melissa:
During MPP, we penned down some goals, and we are still working towards these goals together. And not just our shared goals, but also supporting each other in our individual goals and growth.
Simon:
One of the biggest lessons for me was understanding the difference between solvable and unsolvable problems, which has helped shape my perspective on our relationship even until today.
Some things are simply part of a person’s personality or habits, and over time I learnt that instead of trying to change her, I should learn to accept her for who she is.
How has marriage been for both of you after five years together?
Melissa:
I think it has been going very well over the past five years. I’m still not sick of him yet!
He’s not only my husband, but also my friend, my teacher, and my buddy. We have many hobbies in common, like cooking, travelling, music, and painting, and we are still growing together and supporting each other.
Simon:
Honestly, it doesn’t feel like it has already been five years. Every day still feels quite fresh.
People always say the honeymoon period ends after two years, but I still genuinely enjoy spending every day with her. Even now, I’m still interested to learn more about her childhood, what she was like growing up, and her experiences.
What would you say to couples considering MPP?
Both:
We would definitely encourage couples to attend. It helped us a lot, especially during the season when Melissa was adjusting to a completely new environment and needed additional support.
Beyond marriage preparation, MPP also teaches practical relationship skills such as communication, conflict management, stress management, and understanding personality differences.
Most importantly, having a counsellor guide and facilitate these conversations makes difficult topics much easier to navigate together.
Five years on, Simon and Melissa’s journey reflects how intentional communication, mutual understanding, and learning to embrace differences can strengthen a marriage over time. Their story is also a reminder that marriage preparation is not simply about planning for a wedding, but about building a strong foundation for life together.
EMCC’s Marriage Preparation Programme provides couples with a safe and guided space to explore meaningful conversations, strengthen communication, and prepare intentionally for marriage. To find out more about EMCC’s Marriage Preparation Programme, visit our MPP page here or contact us to learn more.
