Sapna Mathews, Senior Counsellor

“In life, the only difference between stumbling blocks and stepping stones is how you choose to use them”.

Google, Lazada, eBay…. Many companies have been retrenching their staff in recent months. From the company’s viewpoint, this decision may seem like a necessary one keep it afloat. But when you’re experiencing it first hand, it may feel like you are walking through a dark tunnel with no light at the end.

I remember being part of a retrenchment exercise in 2003 during the SARS outbreak in Singapore. The feelings of uncertainty and hopelessness never seemed to go away. The feelings of insecurity, anxiety, and low self-esteem were so tangible. Even those who had their jobs were affected by watching the trauma unfold on their friends and colleagues.

Years passed and today, as a counsellor at EMCC, I leverage this experience while counselling my clients who are in between jobs. When life throws us curve balls, we can either see them as stumbling stones or as stepping stones to something better. If you or someone you love has recently been through a job loss, you may wonder how you can turn this difficult period into something good.

As a counsellor I recognise 3 main steps.

1. Truly recognise and value your mental health post-retrenchment
2. Understand the signs and symptoms of stress
3. Develop a mental health toolkit

1. Truly recognise and value your mental health post-retrenchment 

The shock of retrenchment will undoubtedly impact mental health, especially when the job search process stretches indefinitely from weeks to months. Know that this is normal, and you don’t need to feel bad about this major life change but work towards not allowing it to take a toll on you mentally and emotionally. We just need to recognise the impact, and work on improving our mental well-being again.

2. Understand the signs and symptoms of stress

At the time of being retrenched, the body enters an alarm reaction stage, knowing your financial uncertainty and self-worth have been impacted due to this change. This stress raises the level of the stress hormone, cortisol, in the body. Over time, this elevated level leads to anxiety, depression, sleep problems, and difficulty concentrating. Subsequently, you may start experiencing more frequent cases of a lack of motivation, the desire to withdraw, and greater irritability. Your inner critic may also start to grow bigger, voicing thoughts like “this shouldn’t be happening to me” or “nothing will change, it’s too late for me to be happy.”

Over time, the prolonged feelings of uncertainty and doubt cause individuals to be more assertive, controlling, and hostile towards the parts of their life that they can control such as money, time, and responsibilities. In the worst case, this could mark the beginning of a slow decline towards clinical depression or panic disorders.

Hence, being mindful of the signs and symptoms of stress becomes imperative.

3. Develop a mental health toolkit

Once you know the signs, start building your mental health toolkit. Prepare your toolkit by putting in the tools you may need to fight during this difficult time: exercise, having a social circle that is willing to support you, and having a positive affirming script that you can read out or say to yourself whenever the negative thoughts appear. These tools are awesome to have and can prove to be very helpful to prepare you for tough situations.

I hope that these three steps will help you turn your stumbling blocks into stepping stones. If you found these tips useful and would like to learn more, the counsellors at EMCC are here to support you.

Support and Assistance

At EMCC, we understand that this may be a challenging time for you. We have therefore curated a complimentary emotional wellness package to support those walking this path of unemployment. The programme has three modules:

• A Counselling component which would either be one-to-one counselling sessions or through peer support groups.
• A Life Skills Training component which will consist of talks by speakers around the area of mental health or skills necessary to navigate the job search period.
• A Job Coaching component wherein the participant will be partnered with a job coach who will meet you periodically, to discuss personal goals, overcome personal barriers, and identify employment opportunities. Participants will be asked to complete an additional registration with Workforce Singapore (WSG) or Generation Singapore for this component.

If you have been feeling emotionally stretched and anxious during this period of unemployment, please reach out to us. We are here to help.